One of the things I did during my trip to Sacramento was drive 25 minutes northeast to Rocklin, where my dad was living during his final years. It has been 4 years since he passed, which is the same length of time since my last visit up there. Once I arrived, I didn’t do much, except drive around the streets that I used to go on with Dad. On his visits to get chemotherapy at UC Davis Medical Center in Rocklin, we always took the same streets to get there. I remember these drives like it was yesterday because that was the only chance we had for private conversations.
Before I get more in to that story, let me tell you about our car rides prior to him getting sick: There is something pleasant about being comfortable with not talking to each other and just listening to music in the car…Dad and I shared a lot of that comfortable silence. We enjoyed each other’s music, and sometimes we just wanted to hear the songs that were playing. When he became sick and the cancer started taking a toll on his body, we started talking more and more during these car rides…I guess you can say we both knew that communication was more important than ever, so that forcefully made us talk to each other more often, but in a good way. Sometimes the conversations were light and casual, while some were important for me to just sit there and listen to him speak. He was my biggest mentor and at times intimidating to talk to because sometimes he would break me down so well that I didn’t wanna hear the real truth…But he always meant well and was very knowledgeable and street smart- I felt like I can ask him anything and he’d give me the information that I was searching for.
Rocklin sign on Sunset Blvd.
UC Davis Medical Center- Rocklin, CA.
Ok-So back to our car rides for his chemotherapy: Two miles away from that building was a “Rocklin” sign right off of Sunset Blvd. I always wanted to stop and take a photo of that area but never got around to it when I had the chance…So, I decided to do it this time. Since I was in the area, I also went to the place where he had his chemo. It’s a building that sits remotely from anything else. After taking a few photos, I sat in the parking lot and did a silent prayer for everyone inside that building.
Lastly, I went to UC Davis Hospital in Sacramento, the hospital where Dad took his final breath. On my way there, I was hesitant on going because I was unsure how I’d feel. But then I realized that it was important for me to do this so that I can tell you my story properly…
UC Davis Hospital- Sacramento, CA.
Once I arrived at the hospital parking lot, I just sat in my car and looked at the windows of where he once was. From afar, I could recap the areas that were very emotional for me to see again. I think that I’m still all cried out from what happened during those dark times, so I didn’t shed a single tear while I was there. I did another silent prayer before driving away. Unexpected yet thankful, this added closure for myself and felt a little weight fall off of my shoulders. I am more at peace after this visit, and that is why I am able to finally write about it to share with you.
That’s it for today. Be well. Stay positive. Spread love. Peace.
-J